Read Matt's account of his fun-fun coffee house experience:

--May 10, 2002--

This is the third time i've had to write this, so it's lost some of it's rage. Basically, i don't what's up with our band. Nate and I decided to kick Dan out several months ago but we never really got around to doing it. Instead, the band just sort-of dissolved itself. But i recently spent 725 dollars on a new PA system, so the band has to get back together. I asked this kid, Billy Oberkehr (I probably mispelled his name; i also probably mispelled "mispelled") if he would play bass for us. He seems like a cool kid, but i don't know if he really want's to do it or is just being curtious. We still haven't found a permanant drummer.

Anyway, i'm really pissed off tonight because of this lame-ass coffee house thing i went to at the High school. I was pissed right from the start because we came to the front of the school, where the thing was being held, but they wouldn't let us in because they suck. So we had to walk all the way to the back of the school, which is more exercise than i ever want to get, and then through the school to the front. Then, as soon we get in, they start letting people come in the front, bastards.

The only reason i went is because i figured that this girl that i think i like, Megan Zortman, would be there since all her dopey friends are into that crap. I don't no why i bothered, i really doubt she likes me. But she was there. Unfortunately for me, she was wearing this yellow shirt, the kind that tie in the back and aren't meant to be worn with bras, and the first thing i did when i saw her was stand behind her and pretend i way going to untie it. Then i said something assinine (spelling?) like "Bad Thoughts" right as she turned around. I didn't talk to her the rest of the night. I wasn't really bothered by that, through. What bothered me is how quickly i objectified someone that i have genuine respect for. I mean, i'm sure that everybody has thoughts like that, but everbody sux and i don't wanna think like them. So i'll probably never talk to her again. I'm such a putz.

Why am i even writting this, nobody will ever read it. I guess i'm just venting; venting is healthy, i think.

Anyway, the coffee house itself just sucked. First of all, i don't drink coffee. It has such a high amount of caffeine that i can't not consider it a drug, and drinking it just wouldn't be straight-edge.

Beyond that, the bands all sucked. I mean, a couple of the people were talented and all, but their music reaked of boring predictbility and overall lameness (is that even a word?). The only band i really enjoyed was Lithium, but they were only instrumental, and only played two songs, and went on first. Then some mildly entertaining lame stuff happened.

Then This freaking obnoxious acapella (spelling?) group came on and sang a horrible song about how acapella groups are the best thing ever, jackasses. Then they sang an even worse song (who would've thought it could get worse?) about September 11th and all these dorks were freaking out because the song unintentionally started at 9:11, more jackasses.

During these goings-ons, Lithium set up their gear behind the stage and planned to play as soon as the acopella group finished. Then Beth McNichol, everybody's favorite student council fascist, shut them down. She kept whinning about how she'd been planning this damn thing for 3 months and a change in the schedual would be unfair to her. That's too bad Beth. My heart bleeds for you, really. I plan shit years in advance, but nothing ever ends up the way i want it to. But i don't just whine about how making eight people happy would make me unhappy, i just roll with the punches. To quote Desparate Measures, "I Fight On." Spontanaity is the spice of life. Hey Nazi, Fuck You. Heil Beth! We must bring down the government; the student government.

Then i had to, well, i chose to, watch the French foreign exchange student, i think his name is Bertrone, hit on Megan, and i couldn't believe how jealous i got. I really hate myself. I mean, she's not my property, she doesn't even know i like her; we really hardly even know each other. She can flirt with all the French kids she wants; its not my business. i don't know. If i don't ask her out soon i'm gonna loose all respect for myself. I don't know. Maybe I should tell her about this web site. I guess that could be seen as either really romantic or, more likely, really creepy and embarassing. I don't know. Girls are hard.

I don't know where i'm going with this. I feel better though. I guess you have to let out your emotions every now and then. They say you should alway's end on a high note, so i will say this: My brother's little friends are pretty funny and now i have something kind of interesting on my website.

ROCK 'N ROLL IS NOT CRIME